Conspiracy Unmasked!
In case you didn't know, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is working for ExxonMobil, who is under the larger neo-conservative bulwark, which is secretly led by Jeb Bush. How do I know this, you ask? It's as clear as day, I would answer - just look at recent headlines.
First, consider ExxonMobil's suspiciously impressive revenues. Second, review Ahmadinejad's threat of the "oil weapon." Thirdly, recall recent Congressional discussions of the "bridge to nowhere." And finally, throw Alaska drilling into the mess. Shake this all up, throw it around in a few Congressional hearings, and before you know it, you have a certified international conspiracy. If the facts don't speak for themselves, we can rummage through this mess a bit more...
If Ahmadinejad launches his oil war, the current neo-conservative administration will, in absolute desperation, tack a drilling addendum onto the existing Alaskan bridge project bill. This, in turn, will open the profit flood gates for ExxonMobil, who is the obvious choice for drilling operations. Once the oil is flowing and operations are therefore irreversible, ExxonMobil - being the socially responsible organization they are - will "convince" Iran to resume oil exports under ExxonMobil's promise to "assist" with advanced extracting and exporting technologies. In the end, Iran drops its quest for enriched uranium, neo-conservatives rebound in the polls, and their posterchild, Jeb Bush, steps on Hillary's neck in 2008.
And there you have it: Ahmadinejad, Jeb, and ExxonMobil are in a steamy lovenest, situated comfortably outside the Oval Office (with a field office in Crawford Texas).
Yea, I know, I told you so.
First, consider ExxonMobil's suspiciously impressive revenues. Second, review Ahmadinejad's threat of the "oil weapon." Thirdly, recall recent Congressional discussions of the "bridge to nowhere." And finally, throw Alaska drilling into the mess. Shake this all up, throw it around in a few Congressional hearings, and before you know it, you have a certified international conspiracy. If the facts don't speak for themselves, we can rummage through this mess a bit more...
If Ahmadinejad launches his oil war, the current neo-conservative administration will, in absolute desperation, tack a drilling addendum onto the existing Alaskan bridge project bill. This, in turn, will open the profit flood gates for ExxonMobil, who is the obvious choice for drilling operations. Once the oil is flowing and operations are therefore irreversible, ExxonMobil - being the socially responsible organization they are - will "convince" Iran to resume oil exports under ExxonMobil's promise to "assist" with advanced extracting and exporting technologies. In the end, Iran drops its quest for enriched uranium, neo-conservatives rebound in the polls, and their posterchild, Jeb Bush, steps on Hillary's neck in 2008.
And there you have it: Ahmadinejad, Jeb, and ExxonMobil are in a steamy lovenest, situated comfortably outside the Oval Office (with a field office in Crawford Texas).
Yea, I know, I told you so.
posted by Dr. Cook at 7:33 AM
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