Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Fight Cubicle Boredom

Cubicle culture got you down? If so, I've got the answer.

We call it Cubicle Battleship. Here's how to play:

1. You need two or more teams, comprised of adjacent cubicle dwellers, who throw soft projectiles at their enemies in other cubicles. Emphasis on soft, people.

2. Each "hit" is worth one point. It is the responsibility of the victim to call "hit" or "miss" after each shot.

2. A demilitarized zone, or DMZ, is needed between enemies to prevent harm to dwellers or cubicle decorations. While in the DMZ, you are safe.

3. If a shot falls short of your target's cubicle, thus falling into the DMZ, you lose a point.

4. If you hit a noncombatant (that is to say, someone residing in the DMZ), you are penalized one point.

5. If your shot misses entirely, the ordinance is live, and can therefore be requisitioned by any team.

6. Once beyond the DMZ, you are an open target. This means the parking garage, stairwell, bathroom, and kitchen are all potential battle grounds. I suggest you carry a weapon.

7. Hits in front client(s) are an automatic ten point bonus. Misses are minus ten points.

8. If you catch an enemy's shot, you receive five points.

9. Assassins, mercenaries, snipers, guerrillas, and other unconventional combatants can be hired for your team, but their hits do not count. Their misfires do.

10. Although not awarded points, creativity and strategery are encouraged. So are launching devices, human shields, and outposts.


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